Oh that Silent Night
This is my gift to you. Yes it’s seasonal, but to me, it’s so much more. It’s a reminder that within each of us is a light so valuable, so bright, so inspiring yet so often hidden by our own fear that even we can not detect it. You see this particular rendition of this song was my very first solo in high school. I was so frightened, I just wanted to disappear, vanish into the dark sky, never to be seen again. My stomach was in knots, my mouth felt like I was chewing cotton. I hated every moment of it. And yet there I was. Something deep within, some desire to share had driven me there.
I stepped up to the microphone to sing a unique rendition of Silent Night, with a 100 piece choir behind me and 500 audience members in front. My shaky little voice squeaked out so horribly I had to close my eyes against the reality. But as I stood there, eyes closed, ears listening deeply to the piano and the voices behind me rather than to my little voice, the music began to carry me. I was lost in the song. Suddenly, rather than feeling alone and under a microscope, I became a part of all the energy in the room. My voice began to boom rather than squeak. I felt it rise up from my belly and out through my head. It was a most extraordinary and inspiring feeling, absolutely overwhelming, otherworldly.
The song came to an end. I stood there, eyes closed for a moment, dead silence hanging in the air. Then everything erupted. The audience leaped to its feet in wild applause. Whistles and hoots and cheers filled the room. I opened my eyes and saw people wiping tears from their eyes. Believe me, I’m not Celine Dion, but they had felt it too. They felt the connection, the energy in that room, just the way I had when I closed my eyes to my own fear, fear of nothing more than the unknown. And with the releasing of that fear came the allowing of my own beautiful, unique and unbeknownst to me, powerful light.
In this Holiday season, may this recording remind you of your value, your own unique and powerful light. And may it inspire you to close your eyes to the fear and simply allow.
With so much love and respect.